Me and Tony just saw what I believe is the best movie of the year. Fast Five should sweep the Oscars. It had it all: cool cars, gun fights, hand to hand combat, drama (ha), and sex. It also had 5 of the best cinematic actors of our time in the cast: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Dwayne Johnson, Ludacris, Tyrese. You really can’t go wrong when all those heavy hitters are in the cast.
This installment of the series was chock full of GREAT one liners, but I am going to attempts to bring you all the 10 best quotes from the whole series. Here goes:
10. Twinkie: “Do you know what ‘D.K.’ means?”
Shawn Boswell: “Donkey Kong?” The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift — Seriously? No, Seriously?
9. Dominic Toretto: It starts with the eyes. She’s gotta have those kind of eyes that can look right through the bullshit, to the good in someone. 20% angel, 80% devil. Down to earth. Ain’t afraid to get a little engine grease under her fingernails. Fast and Furious — Dom, describing his dream girl…..sounds like kind of a bitch to me….
8. Roman Pearce: “And we ain’t hungry no more either, brah.” 2 Fast 2 Furious — This was how the end of the 2nd movie ended. Brian and Rome, stole all the money from the “el hefe,” and they apparently were going to buy a lot of food with the money.
7. Shawn Boswell: “You’re like the Justin Timberlake of Japan.” The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift — This one had the worst writing by far. I almost felt bad for the kid when he dropped this gem. I feel like the writers were playing a sick joke on him…..but they weren’t.
6. Roman: “Only my homeboys call me Rome, pig.” 2 Fast 2 Furious — Another great quote from my boy Tyrese. I don’t know who is the worst actor, him or Walker.
5. Dominic Toretto: “I’m a boy who appreciates a good body, regardless of the make.” Fast and Furious — Another horrible attempt by Dom trying to compare women to cars. After hearing lines like this, I truly wonder if there are people who have stuck their dick in an exhaust pipe because they loved their car so much
4. Dom: This you’re beer?
Vince: Yeah that’s my beer… Yo Dom! Why’d you bring the busta here?
Dom: Because the busta kept me out of handcuffs, he didn’t just run back to the fort, the buster brought me back. The Fast and the Furious — Again, I know it’s not a quote, but rather an exchange. It was still cinematic gold.
3. Gisele: [pulls her gun on Roman] “My legs open the same time I pull this trigger. Would you like me to open them?” Fast Five — Spoken like a true lady. BTW this chick is the one from the trailer, in the bikini…yeah you know which girl I’m talking about.
2. Chief of Police Alemeida: Well, if there’s anything we can do to help…
Hobbs: Two things. One: I need a translator.
Chief of Police Alemeida: We have plenty…
Hobbs: Elena Neves.
Chief of Police Alemeida: A patrol officer?
Hobbs: You heard me.
Chief of Police Alemeida: But why? We have many more experienced people.
Hobbs: I like her smile.
Chief of Police Alemeida: What’s the second thing?
Hobbs: [pause] Stay the fuck out of my way! Fast Five — I know, I know, this isn’t a one liner, but it was my favorite exchange DTRJ (Dwayne The Rock Johnson) had in this installment.
1. Dom: “I live my life a quarter mile at a time. Nothing else matters: not the mortgage, not the store, not my team and all their bullshit. For those ten seconds or less, I’m free.” The Fast and the Furious — There was really no question that this one would be #1. This was the quote that started it all. Do you know how many snot nosed kids got speeding tickets because of this one quote? Yeah a shitload.
I know there were plenty of other good ones, but there’s not enough room on this site to include them all. Which ones did I forget.